actual e-mail I sent my mom:
I sent this jokingly because my O-chem work has really taken a toll on me lately and thought it would be funny to send this to them.

Dear Mom & Dad,

As I sit here wasting away doing O-chem, my brain hating me for deciding to double major in Sciences, I wonder why you weren't the creators of the Chia Pet or Peace Frogs even. If you were, I'd be the first in line to the Peace Frogs/Chia Pet empire and rocking out somewhere in Europe rather than... Blacksburg, VA.

<3 a very stressed out daughter,
Mary

Response:

Mary Anne,

In case you weren't aware, your parents live in the richest county in the nation according to the Census Bureau and The Washington Post so stop complaining. Also, if your dad and I had invented the Chia Pet/ Peace Frogs (which we wouldn't have because they are not useful to anybody), we still would have made you go to college and get a job. You know we wouldn't have wanted to raise you to become a jerk. Have fun with your O-chem, it's not that bad.

PS: We're proud of you and are really glad you want to go to Med-school. See you soon.

Love,
Mom