And in the end, it's always okay.

Reed and I had a long conversation the other night (when I should have been studying for a final - it's amazing how ADD you can get during this time of year). Anyway, he's been getting pretty nostalgic recently about an ex and I mean who's to say they don't from time to time. Like I've said time and time again, I don't think you ever "get over" anybody. Even though you say you're over it and you believe that you are over it, I don't ever really think that you really are. You will never get over it. I think the factor that does change is the amount you miss them. You find other people, you "move on" with someone else and your focus shifts and that's your way of being more okay with it becuase you are happy. If you were completely over it you would never think about it and be completely indifferent which I don't think is possible for most people to feel that way towards somebody they once felt so strongly about. Get my drift? Okay so with that said, it was really nice just talking to him and both of us just kind of getting it all out there. It's been awhile since I've a) talked to Reed (which I am going to make a point to do more often because he is great) and b) had a conversation like that with someone. I guess lately I've been getting to caught up in my work (actually, all year I have) that I've kind of neglected to really sit down with friends and do this kind of thing. Sure, I always went out with friends but that's completely different than one-on-one time. Like the late, great, Mr. Warhol once said,

"People are always so boring when they band together. You have to be alone to develop all the idiosyncrasies that make a person interesting."

I wholeheartedly agree and I've realized now that I need to take more time to really get to know people. Okay anyway, back to the subject here... I came across a story that a friend of mine had sent me and given my conversation with Reed the other day - this jsut seems perfect. The bittersweet nostalgia and the fact that we are perfectly happy with where we are now and the frustruation that the two could never coexist... this story kind of just explains it all... Anyway, I thought I'd post this for you guys to read. Maybe you're feeling the same way, maybe you're not, but one day you will and I hope this helps. Here's Jake Bronstein's "Ex's and Oh's"

On a lighter note... school's out and I'm home (not for long because I'll be doing Maymester) but... a well deserved break is here at last! :) Also, last night I randomly got a lot of people in the hall obsessed with Derrick Brown (and I mean, honestly, was it really that hard to fall in love with this man's writing?) They all wanted a copy of "If Loving You is Wrong, I Don't Wanna Be Wrong" and sadly it's out of print, BUT the good news is, I'm working on getting him to come next fall. He already said he would, so I guess in which case he is but I'm trying to get the English department to let him do a reading on campus so lots of people come and get to experience him as we once did in Dylan's basement senior year. Phenomenal. VTU kinda sucks with taking chances on people so I guess I try to counter them sometimes by using my own means to get people to come (usually those that do hear about these shows say they loved them). Next fall, with my own place, hosting should not be a problem. I just want to get the word out. It's hard doing it all by yourself so I'm thinking if you want to help me get some bands and people to come play/do readings. Let me know, I will need all the help I can get...