I swear the backdrop is cool... you just can't see it... there was a mini river thing behind us and metal statues and all that good stuff...  

In the hotel trying to look cool and failing... again Rachel did not get the memo. PS: There was a rabbi convention going on while we were there.  

We were supposed to be saying "I love New York" Rachel didn't get the memo so I look stupid. What's new? Ha ha... I LOVE NEW YORK!  

From another angle in Time Square.  

I took this picture for Matt & Drew... a little ironic no?  

Lights, colors! Mary is in love.  

Time Square & People... lots of people... all the flippin time. 

Some of the pictures are blurry because I took them while I was trying to keep up with the fast pace of all the other New Yorkers... check it out OFFICER ON A HORSE!!!! We don't have those here... obviously 

Billboard right before we entered Jersey.. it says "Welcome to New Jersey, A horrible place to do business, D.E.P Nightmare State, Can Senator Corzine really do anything?"  

Newww York... where the buildings are so tall they won't even fit in a picture!  

The last act of vandalism that the Sarah-Mariott was subjected to... I just thought I'd share. Woooo college.  

I just got back from the most amazing trip to New York not too long ago and I am extremely tired, worn out, inspired, driven, and so many things all at once right now so this post is going to be short. More details to come tomorrow (or today it's 12:16 so if you want to get all technical tomorrow is today). Anyway, I spent my Saturday exploring NoHo, SoHo, The Village, and Tribeca areas of New York and I really cannot remember which area I encountered the fair/open air market... I think it was either SoHo or the Village but anyhow moving along... wherever it was, I stopped by and took a look at the tables that people had set up along the street and came across one that advertised Pop Art. I don't know how many of you are actually familiar with it... but if it helps... think Andy Warhol. Anyway, I was amazed by the displays and I wanted to make my own right there but I didn't have a picture of anything I wanted to turn into Pop Art since I left my laptop at home, but I did talk to the artists there and found out that I could make this online if I went to their website. It's still under construction, but once it's up... I definately suggest taking a look at it. I know a lot of you are moving into apartments this coming fall and if you're looking for something to grace your bare white walls this may just be what you're looking for. I fell in love with it when I first saw it. It's really affordable ($35 for an 8x10 of you or anything you wish to turn into pop art), really modern and different. If you live in the New York or Jersey area, you can set up an appointment by calling the office at 732-494-1102.

OR... check out the website here (remember it's still under construction, so either sign up or check often):

Popart

Ha ha ha... SUCKS!

SLAinsworth7: omg- i was cleaning out my closet and i threw away all of dawns stuff, and there was a cd so i kept it thinking it would be blank and i could use it later...there was def porn on it!!!!!

Continuing with this quasi tradition I made up in my head... here's this morning's poem:

No title
By: Keith Gurgick!!

I am the universal grandfather that whispers stories into the ears of my small grandchildren, in front of radioactive fireplaces. I told a story one day to a boy with ears as big as rabbit's. I told him about a man with a great heart, which he had taken from the living chest of a woman he loved. He kept it with him always: when he went to war; when he returned with a mind full of napalm and burning skin; when he released warm golden fire on his home in an alley. On Christmas Eve, and the verge of death, he ate the heart that he had protected for years. His arms and legs went numb and fell off; his throat was but a phantom limb. His entire body imploded into one throbbing living, five-inch organ, which fell to the ground in his home, the alley. The man lived forever here, in his four-chamber home.

After he heard this story, the boy leapt from my lap and ran to take the hearts of all he loved. He squatted in an alley and waited for death.

Beans = Spilled... I'm spilling the beans.
(Sorry, this is the world's worst title for a post)

I hung out with Christy today... did our usual coffee shop one on one. And in the realization cafe that is entirely our own, today we discovered that... though we worship the very ground that Conor Oberst walks on, he's probably a jerk... a very good looking jerk which makes it so much harder to come to terms with. I'm going to the concert with Drew next weekend so... I'll find out if he is and report back. We also praised his exceedingly controversial Leno appearance and decided that we loved him more for it and in otherwords... that pretty much means we're hopeless and at the mercy of Conor. "The one who loves most is at the mercy of the one who loves least..." Conor being the one that loves least, we're the ones at his mercy. Oh Derrick Brown how your poetry is universal. And I love him too... [of course in these terms, the word "love" is being used in the whored out kind of way - like the middle school I "love" boybands kind of way or even worse "luv" - gross.]

Sadly I have realized that I cannot take the word "love" seriously anymore. When somebody says it to me I can never really tell if they really mean it or are just using it in the same whored out way everybody else does. I think there needs to be replaced... don't get me wrong, people can still continue whoring it out, however for real love [whatever that may be] I think there needs to be another word such as loov or lovre or loveee (prounched lou-vee)... I don't know, I think right now I'm just humoring myself.

In the department of reality and real people that we actually talk to and are tangible, we pretty much realized that our lives are so ironically and creepily parallel and *drum roll please* it sucks. Not as far as friends and summer goes, but as far as boys and everything that goes along with them, in the past, in the present, in the near future. So basically we realized that our lives are just mirrors of one another and that there are people that we have to say goodbye to soon that we're just not ready to say goodbye to quite yet. Goodbyes aren't my forte and they certainly are not hers. And to cry in front of the opposite sex is a "no go" [and I really don't know why] however in the coming weeks it will be so inevitable for one or maybe both of us and knowing that, naturally doesn't make one very optimistic. Also, I brought up the subject of what has pretty much dominated the past few weeks of my life and ironically enough, Christy is going through the same thing right now [and we decided that we wouldn't wish it upon anyone to have to go through this] and that would be: the act of ending a relationship with someone without any resolve. Ugh, could there be anything worse? Of course there could be something worse - there always is, but right now at this exact moment, down to the second... there is nothing worse. I hate ending things on a bad note. Since when do I ever end on a bad note? Since a few weeks ago. There's a first time for everything right? I hate not being able to feel the least bit of closure. I think I'd rather walk away knowing that somebody hates me then not knowing how they feel at all. It just makes things awkward if you ever run into the person again, and it leaves things open to interpretation and over analyzation and that's the worst. Sigh... Third and last topic of discussion on this subject was how blind 90% of the male population is to anything going on around them. Let it be known that it is 2005 and the fact that females aren't supposed to be catalysts still stands firm today... it has NOT died as chilvalry has. Don't even get me started on courtship.

This makes me want to scream. quietly.

*Disclaimer: despite the fact that I have ranted to the 1.4 people that actually read this about how much Christy and I dislike the male species... the truth is we don't. And that's what makes it even worse. Though it would be so much eaiser just to hate all males, that's just not a possibility because people like Andrew McMahon still exist... granted in small numbers - but they do exist and serve as a beacon of hope to all the would have been hopeless females out there. Honestly, we don't hate males... I guess it's true "can't live with them, can't live without them..." also, we love [not in a whored out way] them. a lot. If we didn't, I wouldn't be ranting this much.

PS: I never ever post about my personal life in this much detail ever... so this is definately a first and most likely a last too... because I'm sure I'll regret this in the morning.

Christy's quote of the day:

"Mary, he's gay! It's clear that he likes the pen as much as the next girl. "

Take a dive into the deep end of Ben's head:

How many people, on any given day, do you pass by and think about wanting to kiss them? Strangers. Coworkers. Close friends. Not just a peck on the cheek, but an 'I want to pull you into the supply closet for just ten minutes' kind of a makeout session. Now, using fuzzy statistics and goofy logic, figure that somewhere around that number of people must pass you, and think about shoving you in the supply closet for some good ole satisfaction. Secretly, they're thinking it about you too. A little more math, and you can figure that at least a FEW of these must overlap, causing a mutual moment of spontaneous attraction. Unrealized. Unmentioned. Unsatisfied. Yet possible. On any given day, you pass a LOT of people. How many times do you miss out on these frolic opportunities?

Ha ha... it's actually kind of true.

Reflection while listening to Ani Difranco...

A good friend of mine [Christy] is visiting from Purceville [only half an hour or so away] today and I'm pretty excited. My beloved car is in the shop. Apparently my mother did some damage to the breaks when I was in school so hopefully I'll get it back by the end of this week. It hasn't been a handicap though which has been really fortunate. My dad gets home from work around 3 so I can take the Benz for a spin or people randomly come over which I love even more. Anyway, scratch that tangent... Christy is coming and I am happy to be able to spend some time with this girl. We go way back... :) She's doing Maymester so she'll be in Charlottesville for the beginning of the summer, I may have to take a roadtrip down there to visit her... anyone want to come with? I have tons of room in my car and it'll be fun... I promise you we will listen to good music the whole way there. I decided to go for runs every morning just in my neighborhood and so far... I've actually been doing it. I wake up at 8am and go run for an hour and come back and do some pilates and shower. It's not as hot in the morning so running feels good, plus the scenery around here is so nice and in the morning I think is a good time to just soak it up and take it all in. I always feel so much better when I go running though... I think I'm going to keep it up. I'm beginning to notice that I see the same people every morning out the same time I am exercising or what not. In a way, I've come to incorporate them into my morning work out... I always see this woman walking her dog at the same time, in the same place every morning. If she wasn't there one morning, I think I would be really worried. I wonder if she would be too if she didn't see me one morning.

Apparently Wednesday = New J.Mraz song

So yesterday, I guess the addition of Wordplay onto myspace was for press purposes. The usual 30 second clip from the new CD wasn't up yet on the site, but it is today and it's fun and makes me want to dance a little... note: a litte.

Check it out:

O. Lover

Top of the morning = New poem up just for YOU. Feel special... very special.

No title
By: Keith Gurgick

Love is the tear in the shot glass.
Love is the broken neck,
Decorated with lipstick smears.
Love is the crosshair

She waits for me in the train station
Dangling procreating worms above the tracks

Love is dark red wine,
Sliding down the throat like-silk-slides down her shoulders.
Love is tracing the lazy lines of her hips,
Living the lazy lines from her lips
Lining her lips with long, lazy sips.
Love is the soldier's note,
Smeared with gunpowder.

She talks like a kite settling on the breath of God.
"Lover," she says to me, "I'm leaving you."
Her feet rise an inch.
"I left you something."
Her feet rise a foot.
"It's behind your bedroom wall."
She's gone.
I run home into my bedroom.
I wield a sledgehammer,
It makes sweet sweet love to drywall and two by four.
Behind the wall is the sky, and a smoke trail that reads
"There was never anything there.
I just wanted demolition."
I imagine her introduction to a plane engine.

Love is a kiss so hard
Fine china falls to the floor, a tango to a glittering beat,
Leaving soles of feet bloody with broken glass.
Love is a secret time bomb,
Strapped to chests,
Count down to zero when arms unfold.
Love is an inaudible whisper,
Spoken to a deaf ear, utter gibberish.
Love is insomnia.
Love is burning a pyromaniac at the stake.
Love is !KAPOW! love is a sweaty circus.

I see my black and white parties are catching on. Nina Cohen has informed me that she is going to be participating in her first come Friday! I wish I could be there with her, but I will be exploring in New York. I'm telling you these parties are so crucial this summer. so crucial. Stay tuned... the hosts of the original black and white party are bringing it back this year... (Keirn and I that is) get excited. :P

Tuesday = New J.Mraz song up

Check it out here:

Wordplay

I really like this song and I'm really really looking forward to this CD.

PS: The Rocket Summer's new CD "Hello Good friend" hits stores T-T-Today Junior. So go and grab yourself a copy, unwrap, stick into your cd player, roll your windows down, proceed to drive and never turn back.

As promised here's the poem of the day from that literary magazine I was telling you about.

Christmas on interstate 28
By: Alek Shamloo

Man 1

Walks along an overpass.
Wind at his left side. Just 43 degrees.
Cars beneath his feet.
Buried beneath the cement.
He climbs over the barricade.
Toes to the edge... contemplating suicide.
Steel rushing towards him.
Cars blaring below him.

Man 2

Looks at the picture of his daughter in his rear view mirror.
He simply cannot wait to hold her.
He knows it's Christmas and her gifts are waiting in the back.
Wrapped by him.
Bought by him.
The car ahead of him quickly swerves.

Man 3

His hands covered in the blood of his newly wed wife.
Travels along the freeway for an escape.
Nothing to lose.
He's traveling faster than everyone else.
THe gun rests beside his leg.
Feels cold on his hand.
Lets it rest on his lips.

Man 1

Turns his back to the cars...
Wants one more day.

Man 2

Swerves away from car.
Daughters' picture falling from the mirror.

Man 3

Puts a metal slug through the roof of his car.
Falls forward with foot on gas.

13 car pileup by man's suicide attempt.
One car reportedly flipped over and clipped an overpass.
Striking a man and killing him instantly. Behind me
You see Christmas presents thrown from a car that was torn in
half. The driver who caused the wreck was... life lighted and recovering from a bullet that entered his mouth and exited through his left cheek.

Post Secret has posted a new set of "secrets" so go check them out. Here's one of them that really caught my eye. I feel so bad for whoever wrote this. I hope that the person that they are talking about ends up seeing this and everything works out. Also, I think I'm going to try to make one of these this summer and see if it get's posted. I hope it turns out well... I'll keep you guys updated with the latest on this endeavor.

I discovered a copy of an old literary magazine tucked away in a box somewhere in my room this morning that was put together by some friends of mine. I went back and read all the poetry and short stories in it today and I think that now that I've done that, I have a greater appreciation of their work. I always knew they were great poets, but I never really read through this magazine when I got a copy of it - I must have skimmed through it and packed it away when I moved but I'm more intrigued by it the more I read. It's funny how you can know someone for so long and then read something they write and realize that you never really knew them at all. Anyway... I'm going to post some of these poems because I really like them. I think I'm going to post a different one every day. Here's the first - Enjoy.

Death wears overalls every day of the week
By: Keith Gurgick!!!!

If God deleted the parentheses of my body
and it exploded like a grenade
my soul
a homeless dancer
would float like dirt on a river of gold
and wash ashore on the coast of God's pubic beach
I lied there for days
waiting for my eyes to adjust to the light of this new plane
i saw mounds of beer bottles
filled with notes
and a neon sign above reading "out"
the bottles were carried away with the outgoing tide

i picked one from the virgin white beach
uncorked and read
"I can't remember your name"
written under
was a response
"you know my name"
tatooed on the insides of our lips
it is written on your spine
it is carved like the initials of lovers in trees
and bird-drop covered picnic tables
it is yelled from the gutters, and rooftops, of New York
on each and every blood cell
in the caves of the unexplored pacific
the guts of a soldier
the fingers of a pianist
the pen of a writer
the heart of a monster

a love letter
a war letter
a grin
a tear
a pause
a rush
a bullet
a suture
a first
a last
a son

you have seen my name
and now
go home
look under your pillow
you will not find change
in return for your teeth i have given
you
a star

* I love this poem. Where do I even begin? I like the stacatto section near the ending. I love the metaphors, and allusions, the pace... the way it ended, everything about it.

"If I were anymore productive, I'd be a multiplication table"

- Jack.

I heart summer! :D

I just got back from the beach a few hours ago and it was a really fun weekend trip. I did some pool side tanning and then continued reading A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius on the beach. It was very relaxing. I did a little shopping with my mom as well while we were there and bought the most perfect sundress ever and that made me really happy. I really want to wear it, I just don't know where. Maybe I'll pick a random day to wear it around and just be happy. Speaking of happy, my mom got me a new Yoga/Pilates matt... and that was pretty exciting. I don't know why. Everything makes me happy, I like being in a good mood. But anyway I think tomorrow I'm going to wake up and work out a bit... do a little bit of pilates and go for a run to the waterfall (the fake waterfall might I add) because I haven't done that in a year and it's not as hot in the morning so that would be perfect. Oh PS: A little birdie named Matt frikin awesome Martin told me that Ben Folds and Rufus Wainright are doing a concert together the day after my Birthday here so I'm really excited and it's certain that I'll be there. :D I really like how every year a really good concert falls on or right around my Birthday because then it gives me something to do. Not that I woudln't have anything to do, but I'd rather go to a concert with friends than anything else. I think I'm going to hit the sac now, I'm pretty worn out.

As my good friend Doups would say "G-nizzle"
PS: He's from Cananda.

A 73 degree day = omen for awesome summer.

Today I realized how much I miss triving with the windows down and sunroof open. Sunglasses on, UV rays spilling in at every angle, great music, lots of road (a bit of NoVa's finest traffic to get me back in the swing of things), nice weather, tank tops... perfection/happiness. I think I got laughed at by lots of drivers who saw or heard me singing as they drove by. :) I don't mind though... I miss this and I haven't done it in awhile... laugh all you want, at least I'm happy.

I'm off to the beach tomorrow just for a weekend gettaway with my mom to kick start my globe trot. :D

Headed to New York City afterwards and couldn't be more excited... here goes.

Mmmm mmm Andrew McMahon of Jack's Mannequin! 

Lots of Randomness that makes me happy:

LiLjKiM703: uhmm.. im pretty sure Zack Bailey from juxta just imed me.. i dont know how or why. i didnt even facebook him.... weird. but totally sweet. hahahaha. :-)

Man, if THE Zack Bailey from Juxta IMed me... I think I'd be pretty McFlippin happy too.

VT Juxta - the hotness.

So... Andrew McMahon has a side project called Jack's Mannequin. And if you know me, you know that I love this man. I bought tickets to his May 29th show (2 days after Bright Eyes) at Fletcher's in Maryland. If you want in, let me know... but if you can't make it to the MD show try to make it at some point. I think it would be a good experience.

Listen to Jack's Mannequin here

Check out the Jack's Mannequin blog here

Get a sneak peak of Jason Mraz's new CD in the link below. Every Tuesday a 30 second clip of a song on the CD is posted for a week. This week's song is Geek in the Pink... I like the vibe. Check it out for yourself:

Geek in the Pink

In other news... too much time in California or LA Film School causes people named Colin to start speaking like this:

LostInEmo86: sup jigga

*I know, it scared me at first too... where is Colin and what have they done to him?

I came home yesterday and spent the first night of my summer on a balcony overlooking the Potomac River and The Kennedy Center... I must say... it was an amazing way to start the summer. I was in Georgetown at Sequoia's for my uncle's Birthday. The weather was perfect. It was about 10pm and still 70 degrees outside which is unusual for Washington, DC. The fountains were gorgeous... the only thing I was missing was a camera. I'm going to definately go back at some point this summer. It was phenomenal.

PS: SO good to sleep in a queen sized bed!

Away message responses :)

Original Away message: Exams at ungodly hours in the morning (cough 7:45 am cough) should be outlawed.

People who have to take 7:45 am exams (like me) should be given a small pet seahorse as compensation.

*Note: I really really want a pet seahorse this summer (it has to be small though). That would be the shit.

Via CJ

wwoodpecker22: the small pet seahorse is on its way
wwoodpecker22: ;p good luck on your exams!

Via Doups

Doups of CAN: *rolling eyes* ugh stop complaining I got up at 6am for the robotics thing and didn't even end up going
Doups of CAN: lol plus i get up a few hours after the crack fo dawn every day :-)

Ha ha... I think that officially makes you a loser! Plus you're going to UIUC... who does that?

Via Dev

dev kid86: yes, I agree! a small pet seahorse should be appropriate collateral for early exams!

Amen.

Here's a poem very suiting for this occasion

Vacation
Rita Dove

I love the hour before takeoff,
that stretch of no time, no home
but the gray vinyl seats linked like
unfolding paper dolls. Soon we shall
be summoned to the gate, soon enough
there'll be the clumsy procedure of row numbers
and perforated stubs - but for now
I can look at these ragtag nuclear families
with their cooing and bickering
or the heeled batchelorette trying
to ignore a baby's wail and the baby's
exhausted mother waiting to be called up early
while the athlete, one monstrious hand
asleep on his duffel bag, listens,
perched like a seal trained for the plunge.
Even the lone executive
who has wandered this far into summer
with his lasered itinerary, briefcase
knocking his knees - even he
has worked for the pleasure of bearing
no more than a scrap of himself
into this hall. He'll dine out, she'll sleep late,
they'll let the sun burn them happy all morning
- a little hope, a little whimsy
before the loudspeaker blurts
and we leap up to become
Flight 828, now boarding at gate 17.

Best caption under a Ben Affleck photo that I have ever seen... Via my Biology book!

"Both this male scorpionfly and this male human are exceptionally attractive to females of their species. The secret to their sex appeal may be that both have highly symmetrical bodies."

Ha ha so I guess now instead of saying "you're hot," or "you're sexy," I should say "you impecable piece of symmetry," I'm going to do it... you just watch.

I think the authors of this book were just trying to find a way to put a picture of Ben Affleck in it. It still made me laugh though. :P

PS: By this time tomorrow, I'll be home! Doesn't feel like the last day of college.

Matt has perfected the 2nd grade "ask out" note. Ha ha... loser.

e n u M 3 r i x: love
e n u M 3 r i x: do you want to get breakfast before i take my exam
e n u M 3 r i x: check [Yes] [No]
Surf N Waves 04: ha ha yes.

I don't know if any of you guys caught Bright Eye's performance on Leno the other night... It was higly controversial and exceedingly balls-y. Conor performed "When the President talks to God." I've seen this song performed live and I really have no words to describe it. Here's a link in case you missed it on Leno... leave your thoughts.

Bright Eyes on Leno

Lyrics to the Song (some of it gets censored)

When the president talks to God
Are the conversations brief or long?
Does he ask to rape our women’s' rights
And send poor farm kids off to die?
Does God suggest an oil hike
When the president talks to God?

When the president talks to God
Are the consonants all hard or soft?
Is he resolute all down the line?
Is every issue black or white?
Does what God say ever change his mind
When the president talks to God?

When the president talks to God
Does he fake that drawl or merely nod?
Agree which convicts should be killed?
Where prisons should be built and filled?
Which voter fraud must be concealed
When the president talks to God?

When the president talks to God
I wonder which one plays the better cop
We should find some jobs. the ghetto's broke
No, they're lazy, George, I say we don't
Just give 'em more liquor stores and dirty coke
That's what God recommends

When the president talks to God
Do they drink near beer and go play golf
While they pick which countries to invade
Which Muslim souls still can be saved?
I guess god just calls a spade a spade
When the president talks to God

When the president talks to God
Does he ever think that maybe he's not?
That that voice is just inside his head
When he kneels next to the presidential bed
Does he ever smell his own bullshit
When the president talks to God?

I doubt it I doubt it

Via Chris

What happened to the time between the terrifing first day of college, and these last sad days of it?
This is the first time that i'm not very excited about the end of school. (if you were here, you'd understand) HOKIE FOR LIFE

*Awww... so true. I'm going to cry. This is so sad. This year has been amazing and I've had the good fortune of meeting some of the best people ever and I want to just thank all of you who have made this year a blast. I'm going to miss you guys and all of your antics, random misfortunes, and last but not least the fun times we've had. I hope you all have a good summer and if you need a place to visit/stay for the summer you're welcome to stay with me. These goodbyes haven't been easy, but they're inevitable. Just know that I love you and can't wait to see you again.

I can't handle this. :(

"Sometimes I wish I had never met you. Because then I could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there." - Pat

It doesn't have to be this complicated.

Via Zach...

wow, after one alcohol, law enforcement, fight, adderal filled, painful, crazy night . . . I think it's time to go home and thank the woman who put me on this earth . . . and thank god I am not in jail and that I found my phone . . . way to end the year kids

*Way to end the year indeed. Of course this would happen to Zach... so funny.

Via Post Secret... click the link below to check out this awesome project. Enjoy! I certainly did.  

Post Secret!

I really think this is a great project. You can share your secret to strangers via Postcard and it will be posted on this site.

Check it out by clicking *this*

Leave thoughts/comments. :D

Confession:

I listened to Disney music this morning (well I guess yesterday morning) and I'm not gonna lie... I had fun singing along. :o)

Drew left this morning to go home. His exams ended Friday night. Lucky! Ha ha, I'm here until Tuesday just counting down the days and studying along the way. It was kind of sad saying bye to Drew but not really because he only lives 10 minutes away from me back home and it's not like we're not going to see BRIGHT EYES MAY 27th! Gosh I cannot wait.

Song of the Night:

The No Seatbelt Song
Brand New

So, it's sad this doesn't suit you now.
And me fresh out of rope...
Please ignore the lisp, I never meant to sound like this.
So take me and break me and make me strong like you.
I'll be forever grateful to this and you.

It's only you, beautiful.
Or I don't want anyone.
If I can choose it's only you.

Fix me to a chain around your neck and wear me like a nickel.
Even new wine served in old skins cheapens the taste.
I shot the pilot, now I'm begging you to fly this for me.
I'm here for you to use, broken and bruised.
Do you understand?

It's only you, beautiful.
Or I don't want anyone.
If I can choose, it's only you.
But how could I miscalculate...
perfect eyes will have perfect aim.
If I can choose, it's only you.

"we're wrecking" and I'm dry like a drum, when you scream so fine I'll leave.
We're stranded, we've got time and trials, measured in miles. We slave for days (and weeks).

It's only you, beautiful.
Or I don't want anyone.
If I can choose.
It's only you.
But how could I miscalculate...
perfect lies from a perfect dame.
If I can choose... it's only you.

Ha ha this is definately a first...

Me: hey, where are you taking me?
J: I'm taking you to the basement where I will slowly seduce you and then proceed to rape you

Via Tony.

you were wrong about yesterday. you never think before you speak last year thinking, you could be made for me. she said "some races can't be won and so we fade with the setting of the sun."........in the movies.....on the big screen...i'll make you mine. we'll dance all night.

wow.

Kathleen's profile makes me look so sketch:

M0chaMag1c: I love that you get cold when it is 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
HokiesMary: awwww!
M0chaMag1c: it's from when harry met sally
HokiesMary: well sally is a lucky bitch. i wish i had a harry,but not a harry ho.
HokiesMary: i just did a line of coke

Okay... she cut out half the conversation between harry ho and line of coke... so it is a lot sketchier than it sounds. No, I am not a coke addict.

Ugh, horrible horrible day. (Friday) It's technically "Saturday" so don't get confused.

But thank you Nina and Kaj and the people who sent me text messages throughout the night (Kenneth/Kathryn) and turning the worst day ever around... love you guys.

Exhibit 1: the most perfect thing a male can say via Kaj

K4Jx0r: yes m'am

*Sweet and simple... just like he is. PS: Kaj has the misfortune of having to take a 4 hour philosophy exam on the last day exams are offered at Wake so if you guys could somehow channel some positive energy his way, I'm sure he would appreciate it.

Exhibit 2: ways to make a girl smile via Nina

Auto response from sportschic326: note to self: never EVER try to study with amanda again

note to self number 2: mary fuckin le is amazing.

*Thanks Nina fuckin Cohen. You're pretty amazing yourself! Also, Nina went a step further and called me and that definately made my day better. Sometimes you just need somebody to talk to and she couldn't have timed our lunch session more perfectly.

Exhibit 3: Technology was meant to be used via Kathryn & Kenneth in the form of text message

Kathryn: PS: cheer up!

*Done! I cannot wait to go to NY with her.

Kenneth: Turn that frown upside down!

*Mission accomplised. Thanks!

Message received from Devin last night
(Gosh I swear those Wake Forest kids are little tanks... do we not remember Patrick ordering me to go out on Paddy Murphey's too?)

dev kid86: No more studying! It is Cinqo de Fucking Mayo! Get drunk!!
Auto response from dev kid86: IT IS CINQO DE MAYO AND I COMMAND THEE TO DRINK!

*Note: I did not participate in Cinqo de Mayo festivities last night... I opted to nerd it up in Torg instead and had the overwhelming urge to streak through the building after 3 hours of nonstop studying. I hated the environment, it was far too scholastic... I guess that's what Tech was going for. Anyway, tonight I think i'm going to do a dance or something, bring some of my own music, randomly at 2am do a dance and peace out by way of my escape route. Somebody get it on tape. I'm doing it.

Since this is the last Friday of the year... I offer you a blast from the past via a series of pictures. This has been an amazing year full of ups and downs, but if I could go back, I wouldn't change any of it. Thank you all for making it so worthwhile. I hope you guys have a fun summer, I'll miss you tons... actually, I miss you already... but come Fall, I'll see you guys in the lane. :D

Love,
Mary

I love the Hokies! We'll be back in the Lane soon.  

Sigma J & Zdubs Oocyte (aka best Bio buddy ever) Aw, I'll miss them so much.  

The only time in Matt's life he'll ever get fresh with Sarah...  

No explanation needed. I will miss the roomie 

Lee 415, how good times within your quarters shall be missed. How the ledge in the hall will miss Drew's ugly face...  

Jerry "discovering" Sarah's goodies.... while Sarah is oblivious. 

This is news to me.

Love is Real
Jason Mraz

Love is real it is not just in novels or the movies
It is fact and it is standing here right in front of you
So if you just open your eyes, oh what a sweet discovery
There is hope, and there is joy and there is acceptance

So now let all the light that collects on your plants keep you warm, make you
smile
And I will be there with this pen in my hand to record all the while
You'll be laughing so loud that the house will shake with sound
And everything will be as new as the day it was found

Oh, love is real it is not just in long-distance commercials
Or something that you thought you felt back in high school
So I will turn black and white become that horoscope you're reading
It predicts that something good is on its way

And I'll send you all the world green and blue in a box through the mail
You can open it up, hold it right in your hand and be glad that it's there
And be glad that you're there

Now you can feel all the knots in your stomach they start to untie
And suddenly it's not so hard to say you're alright

Oh, love is real it is not just in poetry and stories
It is truth and it will follow you everywhere you go from now on
So if you just cast all off your doubts then your lips would answer for you
Oh, my darling when you smile it is like a song
I cant hear it now
And I can hear it now...

Let's hear it for VT Professors

I'm going to miss this!
(turn the volume up)

Ha ha the whitest rapper ever. Dr. Neck! I need to take this man's class!

And I sing and sing of awful things, the pleasure that my sadness brings.

I don't know how many of you actually know this but I guess you're about to find out, I've been in a weird mood lately, a little standoffish I guess you could say. I hate to use finals as my scapegoat, but I'm going to. They've just put me under a lot of stress so if I have been weird to you this past week I'm really really sorry. There is a lot more going on too in addition to finals and I guess for the first time, I'm going to admit that things are not okay. Nothing is okay. Everything has fallen to pieces convienantly during finals. I'll get it together, I promise. I just don't know when. I'm not "me" right now, I sincerely apologize. I will get it together.

I'm feelin' it.

This is what I'm listening to in order to deal:

The Honorary Title
(it's a stream of four songs from their cd)

Love it? Hate it? Leave comments.

" Please don't allow your voice to fade
Don't fall so weak to fault or blame
To give yourself reason for an end "

Jerry and I went to Deet's Place tonight after Empo-ing to get some coffee...

Anyway... while we were there "deep" thoughts on love became the topic of discussion... and here's what we came up with. (Sorry if it sounds hopeless... we just happen to be two pretty hopeless people facing conundrums).

Revelation 1: You know that saying "It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?" I think we both prefer the latter. Why bother putting yourself through all the non-sense that comes with "love," we're all probably better off without it. However, it is not to be confused with empathy. I can deal with being empathic towards another person, that's fine, I just can't deal with the former. And maybe that's what this is all about, just trying to figure it out on your own. I don't see the point when you come up short every time and you end up hurt or feeling like you have nothing. Is it better to settle than to just have high hopes?

Revelation 2: Via the lovely mind of Derrick Brown, short, simple, genius, and true: "The one who loves the most is at the mercy of the one who loves the least"

On a happy note... here's a awesome new T-shirt site run by the guys of bustedtees.com. Check it out, buy a shirt, look cool.

Defunker!

A little exam relief via Devin from Wake Forest:

dev kid86: Mary, good luck, on your finals this week!
I am sure you will do great because you are a geek :o)
And you study really hard, ...and all of that....shit(?)
So relax, breathe, and do not throw a fit!

Auto response from Surf N Waves 04: Salt, sweat, sugar on the asphalt
Our hearts littering the topsoil...

And with that, the finals begin.

dev kid86: good luck, biaaaatch! :O)

Merci Mademoiselle. My favorite line is "I'm sure you will do great because you are a geek" - It's really not that far from the truth. :P This was a fun message to wake up to this morning. It put me in a really good mood. That and knowing that I would be getting rid of my books right after my exam which I did... :D And tonight, I'm having lunch with my hot friend Nicole Ritchie who we sometimes call Laura.

Via The New Yorker (Jan 2005)

Cruelty
(Vermont, 1965)

That was the year my friends were reading
Antonin Artaud and Jean Genet.
The idea of cruelty felt important,
like being so perfect an outlaw
you became a saint. The war was on,
muffled, distant. Where we were
everything happened a few years later
than it did in New York or San Francisco.
Some would say it was too easy
for us to be there, talking
about almost anything. Too easy now
to say we didn't have a clue.
I made it through the first few chapters
of Artaud, and never got to "Saint Genet,"
although I remember the cover clearly,
the dome of his head, his eyes, the stare
that claimed he knew something
I would never know. My friends
moved on to de Sade. And now
it occurs to me that during all those years
I never said "I love you" to anyone,
although I probably should have lied
at least twice, to see if it was a lie.
Meanwhile, the fields and mountains promised
to remain the same, and they didn't.
Great poems told us that nature
would never betray us, but that
really wasn't the point, was it?
And then the theatre of cruelty
stopped being shocking.
We all knew why.

-Lawrence Raab

I love THE NEW YORKER! I wish I could subscribe to it during the school year but the address change back at home and here at school make it far too complicated.

Yay! I got my first final grade back today! It's looking good, I got an A on my Creative Writing portfolio and my profesor talked to me afterwards and told me she really thinks I should go into screenwriting. Though I would like to continue taking english classes and/or electives. This class took care of all my pre reqs so now it's time for me to concentrate on all my Psyc. I'm a science major. When I told her all of this she was so sad and I felt kind of bad, but do you see me screenwriting? I don't think I could do it. That's what Colin does! If I wanted to do it, I'd be with Colin in LA right now going to school with him. But anyway, I guess what I took out of this whole experience is that it's good to know that somebody out there likes what you're writing when you're spilling all your thoughts out on paper for anyone and everyone to see.

EXTRA! EXTRA! Exciting News!!!

MY HOUSE IS FINALLY MAPQUESTABLE!!!! People can actually get directions to it now! Do you know how insanely exciting this is? I moved to my new home in June and because it was a brand new development, it wasn't on the map yet, namely because all the houses had not been built yet. But my mom called yesterday and told me the last one on our street (the one everyone has been waiting for) finally went up. I checked mapquest this morning and ALAS! Directions to Brambleton! :D Lovely. I hope you're as excited as I am! And because today is an exciting day in Brambleton... I should probably do some shameless advertising for the first Verizon enhanced neighborhood and link the neighborhood's webpage...

Brambleton - Finally on the Map! Huzzah!

In other news...

The new Jason Mraz website is up and running. :D Now, I don't know how many of you guys clicked on the link I had on here with a preview of his new stuff... but I'm pretty McFlippin excited about it so guess what? I'm going to link you... and you have the option of clicking on the link. The power is yours (ha ha that was corny, i promise it won't happen again, but of course i'm lying).

Geek In The Pink

Thanks for making me Laugh guys!

Let's hear it for family

Surf N Waves 04: gosh i'm so bored
i DiNiStY i: im drunk so im pretty occupied for the time being

*this is my cousin dan who is my age... ha ha this reminds me of those family gatherings you see on tv where every just gets drunk except this is dan on a sunday night.

She is the Nicole to my Paris and this is why:

ugabaluga86: okay....would u want to get food later, leo?
Surf N Waves 04: yeah sure
Surf N Waves 04: i'm eating light because i have to go to an inductions ceremony that sarah's doing tonight and there will be food there but i can pick up a bagel at deets and go wherever you go
ugabaluga86: haha, yea, its cool, you don't have to,but i always like to hang out with my favorite a-lister whenever possible;-)
ugabaluga86: when's the ceremony start?
Surf N Waves 04: 7
Surf N Waves 04: but i might have to help
Surf N Waves 04: sarah just said she needed me to help
Surf N Waves 04: but if i can't do dinner with you today then def. tomorrow
Surf N Waves 04: we need to make an appearance for our public
Surf N Waves 04: i mean the press is hungry for nicole and paris
Surf N Waves 04: plus we have to keep our street cred
ugabaluga86: exactly,
ugabaluga86: except im doing dinner with the rents tomorrow
ugabaluga86: so maybe lunch? or dinner wed?
Surf N Waves 04: okay well at one point this week we'll have to do lunch or dinner
Surf N Waves 04: yeah works for me!
ugabaluga86: haha, cool, i shall inform the press
Surf N Waves 04: ha ha by that i'm sure you mean you're going to make your assistant do that for you
Surf N Waves 04: hey i gotta go but let me know when you get back!
ugabaluga86: bye girl, have a good day!:-D...stay away from the sag fags....

Via Casey. Ha ha.... wonderful! Way to look cool. :P If you're reading this, could you tell your public what you are doing in this picture? :)  

Ha ha! Way to lose your flip flop at Foxfields. I love my Nina Cohen. I cannot wait to see her this summer at the Board Reunion. Oh and she will be sighted at the Black & White party as well as the Head to Toe white party so if you would like a glimpse... get yourself on the guest list. :P 

And Zach may just be the best dressed male that I know...

Background you need to know in order to experience the full magnitude of this quote: Zach is pledging SAE. Plus, he is really flippin well dressed all the time.

"Ugh, there was a guy wearing JEAN SHORTS in our frat the other day! Jean shorts! That's what Vanilla ice wears. That's the 90s! What kind of frat guy wears jean shorts? I mean please. Get some khakis and try look presentable, thank you."

Me: Are girls allowed to wear jean shorts?
Zach: Girls can wear whatever they want... actually some girls can't.

Ha ha... did this conversation really happen? Zach is the best.

Party? - Let's!

I'm going to be traveling a lot this summer which obviously means that I won't be home much. But do not worry... the notorious Black & White party that Keirn and I hosted last summer will be back again this coming Summer 2005. :P We had tons of fun with that and we feel a repeat is necessary. I'm not sure exactly when we're going to have it, but trust that you will receive an invite within the next month when I figure out when I'm going to be home. Also, this summer holds another great party... theme a la P.Diddy. If you guessed "All white party" you're right. (Meaning that you wear white, all ethnicities welcome). Keep in mind it's white from head to toe. This one will be coming up in August hosted by yours truly so I hope this puts a spring in your hop or maybe gives you a little something to look forward to this summer. I miss seeing you guys so much and what better way to celebrate then doing it like we did way back when? :D

You say that love goes anywhere
In your darkest time, it's just enough to know it's there
When you go, I'll let you be
But you're killing everything in me

Brandon... aka the luckiest guy that has ever lived. Look how happy he is. Ha ha... actually, this is Jane's boyfriend and that's Kathleen looking sketch and me looking tan.  

The yessssssssss "we're awesome" hug! Look how not into it I am. Ha ha. I'm such a jerk. PS: This was last weekend, not this past one.  

The we're totally rocking beer pong against the undefeated team of Mark & White Polo Guy dance.  

Ugh... so they're just going to make this last week and 2 days as inconvienant as possible? Not surprising.

I've had a great semester. Semester 2 hands down kicked Semester 1's ass. So now that I've gotten over the first hurdle (project/paper combo - yes 3 due all in the same week) alive... I have nothing to do until my frist exam this Wednesday. I guess I could pack, but I could probably do that in a day. And my first exam is one that I don't really even need to study for because it's not cumulative and I always get A's on it because Social Psyc just comes easily to me. I only have two exams because I had papers and projects in place of exams for my other classes and I've already finished those. My last exam is May 10th... which means that I have a week of nothing to do after I take my exam on Wednesday. I asked my teacher if I could take the May 10th exam at an earlier date but she said no. So now I'm stuck here for another week when I don't need to be here. Thanks school. Too bad she's letting people who have 3 exams within 24 hours take theirs ahead of time. If she's going to be proctering an exam at an earlier date, it's not like it would kill her to let me take my exam and get outta here. Oh well. I guess I'm here until May 10th. With nothing to do for a week. I definately won't be studying for the final six days in advance. It's just not the college thing to do. Cram Jam is the game... and I play it well. Okay well enough about finals and exams.... I'm signing off, so ready for the summer.