I miss my friends...

I was watching the last episode of Laguna Beach (yes, I suck, throw stuff at me later) and it was the episode where everyone goes off to college and it reminded me of my last week in Ashburn with the people that meant most to me. I remember the two hardest people to say goodbye to were Keirn and Jason.

Keirn was so hard to say goodbye to because she is the ambassador of keeping it real. Through all of our changes she was the one who would keep me grounded and keep me from doing dumb things... she was also that slap of reality when I needed it. She has stood by me for so long and just knowing that she was going to be in Lousiana and not coming home very often scared me. What was I going to do without her? I remember she called me and told me to meet her at Red Robin... she was there with her brother and all of his friends (keep in mind they're 2 years older than us so they are used to the whole goodbye thing by now) and as soon as I walked in, she started crying and I remember thinking, oh god here we go. And so as we say our parting words, we were both sobbing like losers in front of a group of guys that just looked at us strangely and I remember on the way out of the restaurant we were just crying uncontrollably... you'd think we were breaking up or something... but that was that, she was like have fun at tech and just like that we went our seperate ways. Now that I look back, I realized we must have looked so stupid, especially to her brother's friends.

Jason because he was the first person that I met when I moved to Ashburn and the most genuine. And he was just one of those friends I could ALWAYS count on for everything no matter how much I pissed him off, he would be there in a heartbeat if I needed him. It also helped that he lived down the street. Sometimes, I just forget how good I had it... I mean trying to find a Jason here at Tech is not going to happen. But I remember saying goodbye to him. It was so hard. I went to his house and Kevin and Richard were there and he came outside and I just hugged him and was like this is NOT goodbye... this just means until next time. And we pretty much just stood outside until finally he was like, everything's going to be okay, you'll be okay. Tech will be great and that was that, I got into my car and I think I just cried the whole way home. He was also the last person I said bye to... maybe that was why I cried the whole way home, or maybe it was because I knew he was irreplacable.

Then my night in Reston Town Center with Rachel, Brit, Kathryn, Yara, and Kerry... that was a night that epitomized "bittersweet." We had so much fun, we went out to dinner beforehand, then drove out to Reston and ran around, took compromising pictures, made wished on a penny and threw it into the waterfountain backwards. Laughed at little punk kids skateboarding up and down the sidewalk almost envious of them wishing we could turn back time and relive it all again. Then we went to starbucks and all got the same drink and we did our senior wills to each other outside. I remember us all looking so depressed and sad wishing the night wasn't over fighting back tears with every word of wisdom that came out of either of our mouths... willing great college experiences to each other left and right when really all we wanted to do was just rewind. As we drove back to get our cars that we left in the parking lot of the restaurant we ate at earlier that day, I remember all of us just standing in the parking lot not wanting to get into our cars and drive away because we knew that if we drove away we wouldn't come back for awhile. And for some of us, not at all. I remember everyone just looking at each other teary eyed like so... what are we going to do now? And we just stood in a parking lot fighting back tears and finally decided that it isn't over... it's just a new beginning and with that we all got into our cars and I think we all just cried the whole way home.

I'm so glad I get to see them again soon. Everyone seems to be moving on to bigger better things but more importantly, I'm just glad that everyone is happy. I'm glad that people are happy with their school choices and just their station in life at the moment. I'm ready to be reunited again and I'm more than ready to push rewind and pause.