Today, I saw a picture of a tattoo that this girl got in her boyfriend's memory. He died in his German class on April 16th. It was an orange ribbon with a maroon heart where the ribbon normally crosses. His initials were on one side while the date was on the other.I started to tear up a little. Then, I found out she got it in that particular place because that's where his arm rested on her when they slept. :( I think I actually started crying at this point. It's difficult to think of what should have been. It's heartbreaking, really.

The whole situation is still very hard to deal with. The media focus on the event has ended which I'm pretty thankful for, but the emotions are still pretty raw. I still curl up and cry from time to time. I've been doing it a lot less now, but for awhile it was everyday. It's amazing how many reminders of these people are still here. I was in Reston Town Center the other day for a friend's birthday and I saw a guy who looked almost exactly like Stack walking around with his two kids. It really saddened me. As much as people tell you not to do it, it's hard not to think about what should have been, could have been, or might have been.

There are just so many loose ends and it's hard to find closure. When somebody dies of old age or cancer, family and friends kind of know that it's coming and it doesn't make it less painful, but they can at least prepare themselves for it. In VT's case, lives were abruptly cut short in such a cruel way that it is at times impossible to deal with. I keep going through the last time I saw Stack or Daniel in my head and I just wish I could have hugged them a little tighter, or just stuck around a little longer.