Things that girls spend their weekends discussing

Okay well here goes... for those who are brave enough to read what will probably be rant that is far too long in regards to the opposite sex.

I visited a good friend of mine this weekend at Wake Forest and right now in particular she's going through a tough time. She has just gotten out of a long term relationship recently, but has found herself moving on and happy with the person she is now with, however her ex is having trouble letting go and is still trying to win her back which is causing a lot of turmoil for her.

While she was explaining her situation to me, our girl talk naturally progressed to talking about relationships in general and what works and what doesn't work. We got to talking about what we wanted out of relationships and what we think is most important and what has gone wrong in the past that has made us realize this.

Before I compile our great list for you, let me just reiterate the fact that I happen the be the most commitment-phobic person ever. Usually, when I get to the point in a relationship with someone where they want to take it to the next level and "commit" or put a title on the relationship such as girlfriend/boyfriend... I freak out and call it all off. When I explain to the person, whoever it happens to be, that it is not them and that it's me - they are disappointed and hurt that I give them this cliche and non-descriptive answer. But, honestly, that's really what it is. It's ME. I don't know why I cannot accept commitment. Maybe it's because I really enjoy my independence and perhaps I'm afraid that this person will not understand that and I don't want to hurt anybody so I stop it before it begins. I also think this is why I tend to lean towards long-distance relationships, because I still get to have my independence while maintaining a deeper connection with someone but not feel suffocated at the same time.

So here's our list... I guess the above was a terrible segway into it, but I did warn you that this would be a rant...

The guy must be okay with...

- not eating dinner together everyday
- not spending every waking hour of existance together
- most of my friends being guys (hey, it's plutonic!!! plus, this school has a terribly skew guy: girl ratio, get over it)
- me wanting this person to hang out with his friends and not hang out with me
- not completely changing just for someone else
- me having lunch with an ex-boyfriend from time to time (I think this is the ultimate test)
- my friends, and even if he dosen't like them he must be friendly with them
- me not wanting to hang out from time to time
- me going out by myself or doing things alone
- my independence and with that hopefully comes the ability for this person to accept that and not take it from me.