Thursday, August 26, 2004

Today in English class my professor told me the "secret to life..."

What is the Secret to life you ask? - The answer is simply transformation. I know this hold truths... duh of course we have to transform, I'm surprised I didn't think of it earlier. It's one of those things so simple that you tend to overlook. Whenever somebody used to ask me what the secret to life was I'd always respond by saying "well, I suppose it's to just live your life - really live it, and embrace all the trials and tribulations and to look forward to the laughter. I would tell them something cliche like how life is a roller coaster ride with its ups and downs and in the end when you look back you'll love it and realize the ups and downs are what made the ride so amazing to begin with and then I'd conclude this thought with, I guess you just have to embrace and take everything that comes your way and love it." I'd like to think that this is still my philosphy, but transformation... oh that transformation.

I'd like to think i've "transformed" and "grown into my own skin" or "found myself" during the past couple years, but then again I wonder if I really have. Nothing much has changed... Sure I've changed physically so technically that's "transformation" and mentally I may have matured but perhaps it wasn't a conscious willing transformation but just the next step to growing up.... oh fuck it, it's transformation, my professor was right... what am I talking about?

PS: I got the Zack Hexum CD today... I love it/him.
PPS: I'm using the term "love" really loosely - I hate "love" (the word love - that is) because I think it's way to whored out. People love their cat, people love their toe nail polish, people love hot guys, people love wet wipes.... if someone told me they loved me, I don't think I'd be able to take them seriously. If you can say you love your toe nail polish or your guitar... and then tell me you love me too... I don't think that would do it for me. - Why am I so difficult? No wonder why I'm destined to be alone for a long time. I think we need a new word for "love" or we should just stop whoring it like we do so it can go back to meaning what it used to... Think about it, if I told you I loved my colored post-it notes and then I told you I loved you, how would you respond to that? Love doesn't mean anything anymore... it's tragic.

1 comment:

resident jason said...

everything is taken in context, dear friend. if i said "you bitch" and was laughing, that's one thing. if i said the same thing accompanied with angry overtones, then it's quite another, right? but, yeah, the word means little to me anymore.